I am a middle aged married Minister w/ children. I have been teaching & preaching in various roles for now 9 years. I was called/ drawn to the Lord some 16 years ago, conversely, I have been having a hard time living as I believe I should. Although I have been blessed w/ an absolutely gorgeous & faith Christian wife, I am yet still addicted to porn & the lust for attractive women. I like looking @attractive women, hearing them, etc. I am drawn to view online, cable access, and my great (photographic) memory, vivid imagination, & dreams all aid in some form or fashion to countless down falls, self-abuse, & sin. I had this struggle post salvation, and even though it has lessened, it still remains. I have fasted, prayed, spoke live and victory over this death & corruption, cried out, fought, resisted, turn off cable, tried various methods, etc. Yet nothing seems to work for long, I find myself time & time again right back in the same!
predicament. I am losing & believe have loss the will to fight, or resist. However, I refuse to live a double life, hence, before I throw in the towel, I am reaching out for your help in the form of effectual & fervent prayers.

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